She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Bang-toberfest begins!!
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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