3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
