Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
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