"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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