porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize