and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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