the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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