It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
