Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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