They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I licked your asshole in confidence.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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