Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
my shit smells like andre
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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