pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
