I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
