From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
