and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Mom said you looked used
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
