She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
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