The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
