Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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