chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
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