I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
