using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
The uberlube is also flammable
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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