Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
