he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
