question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Randomize
