people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
