doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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