Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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