At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
