i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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