I must be too annoying 4 u.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
