We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
