she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
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