Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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