I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
