Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i need an iv and a liver transplant
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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