Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
