so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
