just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
