Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
