There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Randomize
