Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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