She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
