It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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