Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
