Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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