when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize