A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
