Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
