Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
