btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
