is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
